A Time to Text and a Time to Pray

One does not have to be a biblical scholar to know the scripture. 

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven;

A time to be born, and a time to die;

A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal;

A time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh;

A time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;

A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to seek, and a time to lose;

A time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew;

A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate;

A time for war, and a time for peace.   

                                          Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

We’ve heard this scripture read at funerals, at weddings and confirmations. The Birds even used these words to create a rock hit back in the late 60’s. If Soloman had been writing the book of Ecclesiastes in today's world, maybe he would have added… there is a time to text, and a time to pray.

I sat in church this morning and could not help but notice the teenager sitting next to me in the pew checking his texts and e-mails non-stop throughout the church service. This went on throughout the entire service. I mean, he didn’t slow down for a minute!  I will give him credit, however, he never did actually pick up the phone and text anyone during the service. Let me also point out this is not just an issue with teenagers. I first saw this when I attended a memorial service for a man who had died very suddenly from a heart attack.  A very sad and emotional event for family members and most friends, but for one woman seated directly in front of me in the church, she had more important things to think about than this man’s life.  She, too, was glued to her cell phone throughout the service.

I like my cell phone.  I like the convenience of the technology and all that it provides for me, but there are times when I will leave it in the glove compartment of my car and/or yes, turn the damn thing off!  I am not a brain surgeon or cardiologist so the phone calls and texts I get are rarely of life and death matters.  Yes, if someone wants to reach me, I like to get their calls, but there are some times in my life when I choose to put life ahead of the technology.

Enough is enough.  Facebook, Linked-In, Plaxo, Twitter, Digg and all the rest of them, great, they may or may not have a place in your life.  But when it comes to our faith, real relationships with family members and ‘real’ friends (not the incidental contacts on Facebook who are looking for two bales of hay for some stupid online game?), maybe it’s time we put the cell phones down and concentrate on what matters most. I don’t think God meant for us to have our lives in the palm of our hands and quite frankly, my life is hardly my 4G Samsung Epic. 

If you cannot separate yourself from your cell phone for one hour a day, maybe it's time you checked out your priorities. Did it ever dawn on you, maybe your life isn't in the palm of your hand? 

Goldman Sachs and the Loss of Leadership

Over the course of my career, I have worked for Fortune 200 companies as well as much smaller, more entrepreneurial firms.  I have enjoyed good success and also experienced failure.  I have made 100% Clubs, received various awards for a job well done and have been fairly rewarded financially for my efforts.  I also have been laid off and fired.  I have lived both sides of the coin. 

Ironically, as I look back on my experiences in business and intercollegiate athletics, I have learned much about leadership and performance improvement.  While the latter is still elusive for many companies (most companies are terrible at developing their people), the former, leadership, is pitiful if not non-existent in some. The issue of leadership, or should I say lack of leadership, was recently brought to light in Greg Smith’s op-ed piece in The New York Times entitled, “Why I Am Leaving Goldman Sachs” (you can read the article at:  http://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/14/opinion/why-i-am-leaving-goldman-sachs.html?_r=2&pagewanted=1&ref=general&src=me). The letter was published on the very day Mr. Smith resigned from the firm. 

As I read the piece I felt bad for Mr. Smith who was leaving a company he had worked diligently for (12 years) and once loved.  I also felt bad for the clients of Goldman Sachs who, according to Smith's letter, may have been duped on more than one occasion by the company just to make a buck, or millions of bucks.  And, yes, I do feel bad for Goldman Sachs the company because while once a trusted entity whose corporate life has spanned 140+ years, it now has appeared to lose sight of the very culture and vision it once had.  As Mr. Smith points out in his letter, the company's leadership has failed the company and its clients.

I have always believed that the foundation for all leadership is honesty. In fact, I have written a book based upon that premise (Dad’s Last Letter). Being honest takes courage.  Being honest requires an individual to face the reality of their situation and hold themselves accountable instead of rationalizing or putting the blame elsewhere.  More than a foundation for leadership, honesty is the very foundation of our character.  We don’t have to look back all that long ago to see how dishonest behavior and misrepresentation led to train wrecks on Wall Street that created chaos in the markets and sent the economy spiraling downward.  Leaders today like to talk about transparency when the truth is, if we had more leaders who were committed to being honest, transparency would not be an issue. 

Business leaders today need to be people of character, people who value their integrity and understand that honesty is not a sometimes thing. You don't "spin" the truth. We need to get back to practicing honesty in all that we do, at home where our relationships matter most, in the workplace, and every day when we look in the mirror. 

To Mr. Smith, my best wishes.  I have no doubt you will continue on and do well in life.  As for Goldman-Sachs...sounds like a wake up call.  The question is, did you get the message?  

Business, it never ceases to amaze me

Could it be...a company that has been in business for 17 years and has never made a profit?  No, it gets even better. Imagine this same company executing a successful IPO in just the last 90 days. Impossible you say...think again.

Such is the story of Angie's List, an Indianapolis-based company. Angie's List is a 'business review' company that allows individuals to post reviews of businesses they have used and then people who sign up with Angie's List as members can use these reviews to evaluate various companies (from plumbers to pediatricians) before making their own choice for the particular service. A great business model, but heaven help me...how does anyone continue to stay in business for 17 years and NOT make a profit? 

Angies's List reported a Q4 loss in 2011 of $5.9 million. Even though the company did $90 million in sales in 2011 they posted a loss of $45 million. Amazingly, this company with its national presence increased its sales in Q4 by 70% but still could not show a profit. All that said and after 17 years of UNPROFITABLE existence...analysts are having a love affair with this company! I don't get it? One analyst was quoted in an article about Angie's List as saying, "(the company) continues to sustain operating losses in the early development and market penetration stage, which are largely expected to continue."  Early development and market penetration stage? They've been in business for 17 years!  How long a 'ramp up' period do you give these guys? As a former officer of a publicly traded company I can tell you we never were given this kind of latitude. It was make your numbers quarter to quarter or else! 

Now, contrast Angie's List performance with that of the minor-league Indianapolis Indians who despite a troubling economy in 2011 made major league profits of $1.1 million on revenues of $10.1 million. Even though it was plagued with a struggling team, a wet early spring followed by a summer of stifling heat, they somehow managed to sell tickets, put people in the stands, and make an impressive profit. My congratulations to Cal Burleson, General Manager and the entire Indians organization. 

Over the course of my professional life I'd like to think I've learned a few things about business but the Angie's List story is puzzling for me. Really, I just don't understand how any company stays alive for 17 years without making a profit and then somehow can convincingly woo the analyst and investment community in order to complete a successful IPO. I love their business model and I love the digital world they are a part of, but as a small time investor, I look at these two scenarios and I know where I'd put my money..."Play Ball!"

Thank You Expert Access Radio - You made me think...

Today I did a taped interview for Expert Access Radio, a radio broadcast that will air this Sunday, February 19th at 4 PM on 55KRC out of Cincinnati, Ohio (go to www.55krc.com).  The interview was in regard to the re-release of my first book, The Missing Piece - Our Search for Security in an Insecure World. The co-hosts, Steve Kayser and Jay McKeever, were really good guys to work with. They were fun, had a lot of energy and they asked some really great questions. In fact, they made me...THINK. 

Whenever I prepare for a radio/TV interview or public appearance regarding one of my books, I always go back through the book to re-familiarize myself with some of the material I have written. Ultimately, the The Missing Piece is a book about hope and it reminds us that there is always the possibility that tomorrow can be just a little bit better than today. The book is filled with real-life examples of the many challenges we face, the priorities we set for ourselves, and the choices we make as we seek some sense of security in our life.  In the end, I talk about finding something far more valuable than security, something I refer to as the other missing peace.

As part of our discussion today, I believe it was Jay asked the question, "What is the difference in managing your life versus leading your life?"  An excellent question and fortunately it is one I felt fairly competent in answering, but it didn't end there.  You see, based upon my answer, when the interview was over, I suddenly felt the need to ask myself, "Well Bud, what have you been doing the last 30-60-90 days, managing your life or leading it?" 

You see, in our hectic, fast-paced world that is filled with constant change, it is the rare occasion when we put down our smartphone, stare off into the distance and just take the time to THINK. Today, two total strangers made me THINK and I am thankful that they did.

How about you?  Are you ready to turn off your smartphone for 10 solid minutes, shutdown your ipad or laptop, forget about Tweets and Facebook and just THINK about your life and what you are doing with it?  You ought to try it; it just might be the best 10 minutes you have spent in a long time.

Until next time, don't waste your flavor - LIVE Deliciously!        

Learn Something New, Do Something New

I’ve always been a proponent of learning new things and doing new things because sometimes, we just get stuck.  We just get in a rut and do the same stuff day after day.  Weeks go by, months go by, and even years pass – and we are right back where we were the year before except we’re one year older.  Rarely do we challenge ourselves by trying to actually learn something new or do something we have never done before. This past year I was stuck and I needed to learn something new and do something new. The question was, what would I do?

As I contemplated what I could learn and do that would be new in my life, my thoughts went to the game of hockey. Growing up in Buffalo, NY, I learned to play hockey as a little boy. Later in life and going through a divorce at the time, I picked up the game once again and have continued to play ever since.  I have many fond memories of backyard skates as a kid and adult tournaments I have played in.  All that said, I felt it might be time for me to give something back to the game. How could I do something involved with the game of hockey to ‘Pay It Forward’ so to speak? And then the light went on - I decided I would start officiating ice hockey.

My wife shared her sentiments on my decision in one short sentence – “What, are you NUTS?” As a former hockey mom for 18 years, she has no love in her heart or fond memories of hockey officials.  She best remembers them for missing the penalties that should have been called and making the lousy calls that should not have been called!  She assured me she would never come watch me ref a game if indeed I did go through with my plan.  My response?  “That’s 2 minutes for unsportsmanlike conduct and a 5-minute major for lack of spousal support!” She was not impressed.

I registered with USA Hockey (www.usahockey.com) and attended one of their skating and training clinics back in the fall.  I then passed my written exam and began going to a variety of online sources to buy all my gear. Believe me, Canadian sizing charts make no sense. I’ve paid as much in returned shipping fees as I did on my gear! I began watching instructional videos online and re-reading the Official USA Hockey Rules and Case Book, all 370 pages of it. When my time came, I wanted to be prepared.  And finally, last Saturday, I took the ice wearing the stripes for the first time in my life as a hockey official.

I had a great partner, a veteran who has officiated for 7 years. We talked before our first game (we did two) and knowing we would be using the 2-man system, I shared with him my concerns about proper positioning on the ice, rules interpretations I wasn’t totally sure of, etc.  He assured me we’d be just fine. As we skated onto the ice at 7:55 AM he said, “Let’s have a great game, Buddy.” I knew immediately that he and I were a team. Two teams would be playing each other on the ice that morning but my partner and I would be the team charged with the responsibility of managing the game.  

Skating to be in proper position all the time, watching where your partner is, calling Icings and Off-Sides, talking to the players to keep the play moving, calling penalties as needed, staying out of the players’ way, identifying scoring combinations (goal scorer and players assisting on the goal) and reporting them to the official scorer – it’s pretty fast and it requires a lot of attention and focus. It also requires a confident, commanding presence to make sure you keep things under control.

It’s also fun. You’re skating and honestly, I love to skate. You get a great workout officiating ice hockey.  You even get to help some of the younger players learn the game as you teach them and explain certain rules to them often while escorting them to the penalty box.  You have the chance to teach. I like that. It became very clear to me last Saturday that this is a way for me to give something back to the game.

When I skated off the ice after the second game with my partner, I felt this wonderful sense of exhilaration. It was almost like an endorphin-produced runners’ high. I’d had a great workout and yes, I had officiated a couple of hockey games, but that wasn’t the reason for the wonderful feelings I had. No, I felt great because I had challenged myself to do something I had never done before and now, I had done it. I had learned something new and had done something new.

Looking for some excitement in your life?  Want that special feeling of exhilaration and satisfaction?  Then challenge yourself and go learn something new and do something new. 

                                 

      Don’t Waste Your Flavor – LIVE Deliciously!

    

It's Called Praying, Not Tebowing!

I love football. I started playing organized football when I was 8 years-old, played both high school and college football and later coached at the college level.  Yeah, I truly love football.  I also love America and the many freedoms we enjoy; freedom of speech, freedom to choose our vocation, and yes, freedom of religion, to worship as we so please.

Recently, America's 'media machine' has become consumed with what is a simple act of faith for one football player and as only they can do, have turned it into a media frenzy.  Tim Tebow's personal choice to pray whenever he so chooses (which just may be when he is wearing his Denver Bronco uniform) is now no longer 'praying', it is 'Tebowing'.  Are you kidding me?  They actually have invented their own term for whenever Tim Tebow takes a knee....Tebowing?

As a man of faith, a Christian, I do not believe that praying is something someone does or should do for publicity (and I don't think Tim Tebow is doing that). Praying is a very personal act. When and where one chooses to do it is of their choosing. It literally can be done any time, any place, and it can be done quietly or even silently. Some people even define certain activities they do such as running or practicing Yoga as being spiritual, prayerful activities. In fact there is a wonderful quote about practicing one's faith that says, "Preach the gospel every day, and if necessary, use words."  Yes, prayer can actually be someone finding their peace in total silence, waiting for God to speak to their heart. Bottom line, it is a reverent act, something someone does as part of their faith walk. 

Of course, we're America and the new Almighty God is the media. Instead of reporting the news as they did back in the days of Walter Cronkite, Chet Huntley, David Brinkley and other true journalists, today they are obsessed with making the news and all in the name of ratings.  Here we have a young, unproven NFL quarterback who acknowledges his Christian faith more publicly than most athletes. Are you kidding me, this is 'BOFFO' in the news business!  What a hot story to report on! Now, every time he takes a knee, get the camera on him because he must be praying (or Tebowing), right?  Praying for what, though?  A turnover so he can get back out on the field?  A bigger contract? More attention from the media?  Aw, let's keep it simple, why not just pray to win?  Oh, and that's even better, think how much better the storyline will be once he loses as the starting QB and we can hound him to find out why God let him down!
 
The media in America today is pretty pathetic. They have this uncanny ability, this propensity and obsession to take anything that they can find that might be the least bit controversial and twist it, spin it, but do whatever it takes to make it the news of the day. And so they have done this with Tim Tebow and the fact that he is a devout Christian trying to live a positive and productive life as a professional football player. That in and of itself makes him an easy target for today's media. So now they have created their own story and in doing so have come up with their own term for whenever he takes a knee - 'Tebowing.'

Maybe Mother Teresa best put the act of prayer in perspective for all of us when she was once being interviewed by Dan Rather of CBS for a segment that would air on 60 Minutes. Rather asked Mother Teresa the question, "When you pray, what do you say to God?"
 
Mother Teresa said, "I don't say anything, I listen."

Dan Rather, not to be deterred, quickly snapped back, "Well then, what does God say to you?"

Mother Teresa simply responded, "He says nothing, He listens."

Tebowing?  No, it's called praying. 

In this holiest of seasons, may each and every one of you, regardless of your faith, enjoy the love and true spirit of caring that comes with the celebration of Christmas. May God Bless You and your family wherever you may be. 
             

Are You Managing Your Life or Leading It?

I recently have been captivated by how many Linked-In (http://www.linkedin.com/) discussions I am seeing in various business groups focused on trying to define the difference between managers (managing) and leaders (leading).   This is hardly a new discussion.  I remember reading an article in Fortune magazine back in the mid-90's and it essentially said this (paraphrasing).

Managing is comprised of activities that keep an organization running and it typically works best in an environment where there is a well-defined organizational hierarchy.  Leading on the other hand involves getting new things started and facilitating change. 

Bottom line, we need both capabilities if we are going to effectively run our businesses, our educational institutions and yes, our government. But, what can we take from these definitions and apply to our lives? I mean, do you want to manage your life or lead it? 

Think about it. If we apply the definitions above, would you like to go through life just trying to 'keep things running?'  Note that in the definition it states that managing works best in an 'environment where there is a well-defined organizational hierarchy'...does that sound like the kind of life you want to experience? The truth is, managing and leading are diametrically opposed to one another. People who are more comfortable managing love the status quo. They don't want change in their life; in fact, many of these people are fearful of change or of trying new things. On the other hand, people who prefer to lead are just the opposite and are constantly looking for new ways of doing things and opportunities to grow. In their mind there is always the possibility of improving what is already in place.

As a 'performance improvement' consultant I get the opportunity to work with college athletes, sales professionals, and executives from all over the country. For the most part, they are a pretty driven group, self-directed, self-motivated and goal oriented.  But in my travels I do see a lot of people out there who seem to be willing to just 'show up' every day and manage life as best they can. If you think you might be one of those people, maybe it's time for a transformation and what better time to do it than right NOW!

Don't know how to get started?  Here's a simple exercise that might help you get a jump start. Take a very honest, clinical look at yourself and identify three special talents or qualities you have as an individual. These should be talents or those God-given gifts that truly make you special, things you like about yourself or certain abilities you have that you enjoy doing in your life. This is your 'good stuff' or your flavor as I like to call it. Write your three special talents/qualities down on paper.  Now, ask yourself this question..."If I could use these three gifts to do something special to help someone else, be it a family member, a neighbor, maybe even a total stranger, what would I do and how would I do it?" Did you come up with an answer?  Good, now go do it! 

My friends, if you can perform this simple exercise and act on it on a regular basis in your life, you will not only be leading your life, you will be LIVING Deliciously!

Life is too precious to waste.  Don't be satisfied just showing up. Start today. Be the best person you can be, or at least be better than you were yesterday! Use your special talents and do something special for someone else. You will be amazed how this will transform your attitude and your entire outlook on life.

Leading your life really isn't all that hard.  all you have to do is live out this phrase and you'll be on your way...
         "Don't Waste Your Flavor - LIVE Deliciously!"

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and a Happy New Year to You All!